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I Never Wanted To Be Your Weekend Lover

October 6, 2010
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This perspective is courtesy of regular PPGJ contributor Bushytop. Enjoy.

This is big. Kevin Harlan read about it a moment ago and his head literally exploded (Trent Tucker yawned). John Madden is even contemplating ending his retirement and coming back to the booth because of it. Osama bin-Laden has even released a recording promising he will surrender to the US if it happens. It is the biggest thing to happen around here since…well, last year. But it is still pretty big. Purple Rain himself, Randy Moss is returning to the Land of 10,000 Lakes!!
 
Some might try and pooh-pooh this; huge mistake. Randy Moss, let me remind you, very well may have saved football in Minnesota. Prior to the spectacle of 1998, the Minnesota Viking organization looked a lot like the Detroit Lions: Finish 9-7 or 10-6, back into the playoffs, and lose in the Wild Card Game. Blackouts were numerous (talking Jacksonville numbers!) and folks were a clamoring for a stadium (imagine that). And then Randy made a ridiculously difficult TD against Tampa Bay look like child’s play and a star was born. Randy became one, but the Vikings became the only game in town.
 
Football-wise it makes sense. The Queens need someone that can stretch the field, go up and make a play, and get defenses scheming against him. Guess what, The Play When I Wanna Play Kid does all three. You also get two country boys playing together. Something tells me Moss would actually appreciate a pair of Wranglers from Ol’ Graybeard. I think their connection borders on weird. Probably because of the Adult Brace Disease (ABD) they both suffered from. They will be a little fun to watch this season (understatement alert!!).
 
For all the tomfoolery off the field, Randy is more of a malcontent than a legal liability. In this crazy Roger Goodell world, you have to be careful with who you depend on. Randy doesn’t get in trouble like that because Randy doesn’t go out anymore. He sits at home, runs a generic Jamba Juice store or two, plays ball, and that’s about it. Oh, and is a huge hearing aid philanthropist. He’s not Ben Roethlisberger (that Viking is Bryant McKinnie). He’s not Donte Stallworth. And he’s definitely not Mike Vick. On second thought…
 
The only concern is keeping the brooding diva content (hence “malcontent”). Favre does that for the short-term. The ability to do it long-term is the obvious concern, but this move is not about the long-term. It’s about now. Right now (cue Van Halen). If these two can put it together for this season, Randy might get his shot to really rub it in Jerry Jones nose for passing on him, but this time it will be in February and the Cowboys won’t be playing.
 
And I didn’t even mention AP the entire time.

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